There’s a quote often attributed to James A. Garfield: “The truth will set you free—but first, it will make you miserable.” It’s witty, but also deeply true—especially for leaders and anyone committed to growth.
An Executive’s Truth
A while back, I worked with a CEO who had led a high-profile, successful business for over a decade. Revenue was steady; customer satisfaction was high; and, on the surface, things looked great. But deep down, something was off. Turnover at the leadership level was climbing. The executive team seemed disengaged. In a moment of honesty during a coaching session, he admitted: “I’m the common denominator.”
Oof.
Facing that truth was painful. It wasn’t about blame, but about ownership. He began to listen—really listen—to feedback. He realized his need for control had unintentionally stifled creativity and trust within his team. That truth made him miserable for at least a season. But as he owned being a “control freak,” apologized to his team, and made space for others to lead, something shifted. The culture began to heal. Ideas flowed more freely. And the business entered a new phase of growth—with less pressure on his shoulders.
A Truth Closer to Home
Of course, we experience these “moments of truth” outside the office, too.
Think about stepping on the scale after avoiding it for months. You know you haven’t been eating well or exercising, but seeing the number in black and white? Miserable.
In relationships, the truth can be even harder. Admitting, “I’ve been distant,” or “I’ve stopped showing up the way I used to,” can feel like a personal punch to the gut. But it’s often the start of healing and reconnection.
Truth Has a Purpose
Here’s the thing: Truth isn’t meant to shame—it’s meant to liberate. But liberation doesn’t happen without disruption.
That’s why the miserable part comes first. It’s the breaking of denial, the crumbling of self-justification, the moment where our excuses run out. But if we’re brave enough to sit with that discomfort—and not run from it—beautiful things can follow: growth; change; healing; and, yes, freedom.
The Challenge
In which parts of your life are you avoiding the truth because you don’t want to feel miserable?
What if that very discomfort is the doorway to your next breakthrough?
Don’t be afraid of the misery. On the other side of it, there’s something better.
And it just might set you free.
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